Ah, there’s no place like home for the holidays. This time of year gives me a case of nostalgia something mean—-a residue of all that Christmas Eve is-Santa-coming hoopla I can’t seem to scrub off after all these years.
Since I have a little break n’ breather before my next MFA term starts, I thought I’d feature books that remind me of the good ol’ days, when staying off the naughty list was a simple matter of eating your veggies and not getting caught terrorizing your sibling. And when I wrote letters to Santa, ya know, just in case (never got that puppy, by the way).
First in line is The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, which actually is a 14-book series by L. Frank Baum. And in the grand tradition of Hollywood sugar-coating (I’m looking at you, Disney), the Judy Garland movie version is much more saccharine than the novel. Do you know the backstory on the Tin Man, for example? Oh, he wasn’t always tin. There was a love story gone awry with a little bit of “I-don’t-want-my-daughter-to-marry-a-lumberjack”-mom-meddling that resulted in a Wicked Witch chopping off all his limbs (the tin smith did help him out, but the new tin biceps were tricky to get the hang of, and he then cut himself in half with his own axe).
But enough about that, let’s have a cocktail! A very wise relative of mine birthday-gifted me the most perfect book for my particular brand of nerdiness: Tequila Mockingbird: Cocktails with a Literary Twist. It is from this bible of bookish booze that I took the following recipe for “The Wonderful Blizzard of Oz.”
5 oz. pineapple juice
2 oz. coconut cream (it’s probably in the seltzer/mixer section of your grocery)
6-10 ice cubes, depending on desired slushiness
*Now, most of the drinks in this book contain alcohol. This one did not. Crazy, I know. When I bust out a blender for a beverage, there better be some liquor in it! And that’s how two shots of Malibu coconut rum snuck into the mix.
Put all ingredients in a blender and pulse until ice is desired consistency. Garnish with a pineapple ring, if you’re feeling ambitious.
Warning: the consumption of this beverage has not been approved for munchkins or flying monkeys. Blood-alcohol levels may vary.